Tag Archives: robot

Military Robo-Cheetahs, Obamacare for Microchips and Other Techno-Dystopian Shit You Couldn’t Make Up

23 Mar

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by Russ McSpadden / Carbon-based humanoid correspondent for the King Ludd & John Connor Institute of Anti-Technology

[The text of this work is free to share and distribute under the following Creative Commons License CC-BY-ND 3.0]

Genetically Modified Catnip Won’t Save You

The Pentagon has announced that it is currently investigating new mobility technologies that include a robo-cheetah that has already surpassed the fastest recorded speed of any human on Earth.  According to the Defense Advanced Research Projects Agency (DARPA) the Cheetah-droid is fast enough to run down Usain Bolt who set the world speed record for a human in 2009 when he reached 27.78 mph. The Cheetah was recently clocked at 28.3 mph and is expected, following a series of upgrades, to run much faster. In fact, it is now the fastest four-legged machine in history and it’s a predator.

But don’t worry, as the saying will soon go, “You don’t need to run faster than the fastest blood-thirsty military grade nano-titanium hell beast, you just need to run faster than the slowest flesh bag next to you.” Continue reading

Ozark Hellbenders Vs. the Robots: Infographic

14 Mar

U.S. population trends in perspective: Ozark Hellbenders Vs. the Robots

Hellbenders Vs. the Robots by Earth First! Newswire is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License.

Creative Commons License
Hellbenders Vs. the Robots by Earth First! Newswire is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License.

 

 

 

 

The Early History of the Robot Wars, Part 1

13 Dec

IN THIS EPISODE: WTF In the Eyeball, Sexy Surveillance Mannequins and Other Shit Escaping the Constraints of Biology

by Russ McSpadden / Carbon-based humanoid Science and Technology correspondent

[The text of this work is free to share and distribute under the following Creative Commons License CC-BY-ND 3.0]

WTF In The Eyeball?wtf_int_the_eyeball

Researchers at Ghent University in England have developed a new break through technology that promises to make your near future far more annoying — and especially more boring — than any dystopic science-fiction novel you’ve read. In one giant stupid leap in cyborg technology the team created a curved LCD contact lens that can display text messages. Let’s hope they developed new eye drops to ease the discomfort from all those winking emoticons and raunchy sexts, too.  But I guess this’ll solve that 21st century dilemma of needing to maintain eye contact with the person you are talking to while also texting someone else.

According to chief researcher, Herbert De Smet, at the university’s Centre of Microsystems Technology, it’s “not science-fiction” but the first step towards “fully pixilated contact lens displays,” which will one day, with any luck, allow you to watch Gangnam Style in the comfort of your own, um, pupil.

Continue reading